I don't particularly like to share. I know I have to all the time but it doesn't mean that I have to like it. Share my ice cream, uh no. Share the housework, sure! So because I dislike most forms of sharing, I know that I could never be a "sister wife". I don't want to share my husband with another woman, knowing full well that he will be having sex with this other girl. Not in one million freaking years people!
So I was thinking about this because I watched the show Sister Wives on TLC yesterday. I won't lie, I was curious about how that works. I don't know anyone with that belief system so it's not like I can ask my friend about her polygamous sex life. And while I know that it is part of a religious ideology, I think that it's weird. I am not trying to be close-minded or derogatory against it but I just don't understand. (And yes, I do realize stating that I'm not close-minded puts me firmly into that category.)
They had a rotating sleep schedule and individual date nights. There are 12 children between the 3 wives with one on the way. Plus the husband was courting another woman with 3 kids to bring into the fold. Just the logistics of running that household was way beyond me. There are days that i barely function with just 3 people in our house!There are days when no cleaning, laundry or cooking are accomplished because I'm tired or worn out or sick or just feeling plain lazy!
They talked about why they like the polygamous lifestyle. The security of having other "mothers" to help them with the parenting or God forbid one of them died. Their children would have a built in support system of half-siblings and motherly presences to help them. I get that. My biggest fear is dying and leaving Annabelle without a mother. But even though Mark doesn't have multiple wives on the back burner (that I know of anyways), I know that I have my sister and my group of friend's to help her when she gets her first period, buy a prom dress, learn how to properly apply make-up. All the things that I should be there for.
For me, it all falls back on the sharing of the husband. I like to sleep with my husband, in my bed. I'm am not a cuddler, don't touch me while I'm sleeping. It's too hot, too uncomfortable trying to mold myself to fit you better but there is a comfort in having him just an inch away from me if I want him. I've been sick for the last few days and Mark has been sleeping on the couch because he thinks I'll make him sick by sleeping next to each other. But I'm getting tired of that. The first night was great, lots of room, no snoring. I'm ready for him to come back though. And that would be my downfall in polygamy. I wouldn't want to sleep with my husband every 3-4 days and be alone all of the others. Plus, I'm a jealous bitch a lot of the time. I'd be constantly wondering if he was doing it with the other wife that night. Tiptoeing past the door, making myself feel bad if I heard anything.
So Polygamy is out for me unless I get all the good stuff. Date nights, sex, stimulating conversation. She can have the laundry and the cleaning and the grocery shopping. The tasks that I really dislike about being married. But I don't know any ladies out there that would be willing to follow my rules so I guess it will just be me and Mark by our lonesome.
I used to watch Big Love on HBO, just cause I was curious. However I am not for sharing either. To me it just seems strange. Out of the normal way of life.
ReplyDeleteBut
Too each his own.
Uh, No Thank You. I don't understand it at all and personally would never want to share. What I secretly think is kind of funny is how men can't even "handle" one wife let alone multiples!!! ;)
ReplyDeletehttp://kandilandblog.blogspot.com
KandiLand- exactly! My husband says he wouldn't want another one of me running around whining to him to finish the deck, put in the baseboards, mow the lawn:)
ReplyDeleteSoccermom- yeah I know. Just too weird. I had to watch it though because I was just so curoius!